Exodus 20:12 – KJV
“Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee” (Exodus 20:12 – KJV).
The aforementioned Scripture is the fifth commandment God gave to His servant Moses for His people. This commandment is re-emphasised in Ephesians 6: 1-4. The biblical meaning of the word ‘honour’ in the Holy Bible means to demonstrate high respect or great esteem for someone. By honouring our parents we are demonstrating that we see great value in them.
As you evaluate the relationship with your parents whether you came from a dysfunctional family or a healthy family, there is always the burning question of whether you should honour parents who abused and/or molested you, abandoned you, stole money from you to purchase alcohol and or drugs, and other such ills. However, it might be easier to understand what honour is not. Honour is not obeying your parents, no matter what. If your parents encourage you to do something that is illegal or harmful to someone, you can honour them and still not follow their advice. The idea of ‘blindly’ obeying your parents in these situations as a form of honouring is not what God meant. We can and should honour our parents, even when they don’t deserve it.
Beloved, you can honour dysfunctional parents by treating them with respect, even if you do not agree with them. Don’t engage them in arguments and slander. Walk away if you must. If your parents have been abusive and manipulative, forgiveness may take longer and be more difficult but note, forgiveness is more about you than it is about them. They may never apologise and may never ask you for forgiveness, but forgiving is for your freedom and deliverance – a means of releasing any bitterness you may harbour toward them by confessing it to Jesus. Biblical forgiveness, however, does not excuse sin. Each will have to answer at the appointed time.
Thus, it is evident that we must honour our parents. God never amended His fifth commandment. In evaluating our relationship with our parents we must realise that God will hold us accountable for how we treat them. Remember, our longevity in this world depends on it.
Pray
Heavenly Father, help us to forgive our parents for any wrong that they may have done us. Help us to love and honour them despite their faults. Heal us from the memories of hurts, pains, and heartaches that consistently torment our souls and renew our minds, in Jesus’ name. Amen.
Read: Ephesians 6: 1-4; 2 Corinthians 12:14
Bible Reading Guide: Psalm 102:18-28; I Corinthians 16:5-24; 2 Chronicles 24; 2 Chronicles 25
